The following are things that I found most useful during and after pregnancy; however, just because it is listed doesn't mean that it is "necessary" or that it will even be helpful for everyone. Just thought I would mention that...Good luck!
FOR MOMMY
Breast pads
Lansinoh Disposables are the best on the market that I have found. They don’t leak because they are made with diaper material interiors. The traditional cotton ones (any number of brands) always leak and never stay in place. The reusable ones are not very absorbent and also never stay in place, but they are the most economical of choices (go this route if you are really on a tight budget).
Boob paste: Lanolin
Not everyone will need this. Some women experience bleeding and discomfort. I used this product only a little; however, some women swear by it. So, it is on my list. Also, some women suggest putting the paste on your nipples several weeks before delivery in an effort to "soften" them up. I never needed to do this, but some women may be more prone to cracking and bleeding then me. With that in mind, if you are experiencing abnormal pain, bleeding, or other ailments, then you should speak with your health care provider for support. Lansinoh is also the best brand but some people prefer Medela.
Period pads
Okay, kind of gross, but necessary. For the first few weeks after delivery you bleed like a really, really, very heavy period. (I wrote "really, really" twice on purpose.) The pads the hospital will give you right after delivery are very coarse and uncomfortable; so, bring with you some softer, thicker period pads. I found that the overnights with wings worked the best for the first week or so. Later, you might be able to switch to a thinner pad, but for right after delivery, stick with the thick ones.
Medicine Cabinet
Witch hazel, hemorrhoid creams, fiber supplement, prenatal vitamins, stretch mark crème (debatable whether worth it, but some people think so), and Tylenol or Motrin (the only pain relievers allowed) should be considered for your medicine cabinet. Not all of these are necessary for everyone, and most of the time your doctor will prescribe them if needed; however, it’s good to be aware of your potential needs.
Side note on prenatal vitamins: please be sure to take one every day. You can take two of the Flintstones Complete vitamins, if normal prenatals bother your stomach. Taking prenatal vitamins has the potential to affect both how you feel and the development of your baby. In other words, it's one of the most important things you can do for your pregnancy.
Hypoallergenic soap
Newborn skin is extremely sensitive. Don't give them a bath everyday for the first few months. You want their skin to react to the outside air and produce protective oils. When you do give a bath, be sure to use hypoallergenic soap. Most baby soaps are hypoallergenic but check the label to be sure. When in doubt, and as a cost-saving option, use Dove White. For more information on hypoallergenic soaps, see the next two chapters.
Diaper Bag
A diaper bag is totally necessary and totally personal. I’ve yet to find one I love. Pick wisely because you’ll be living with this bag for a good year or more. As a time saver, you probably won't want to change your diaper bag like you might change your purse. I've taken to the habit of carrying my purse items in the diaper bag. It makes for one less thing to carry.
Side note: All parents are different. Don’t feel bad if you don’t travel with everything and the kitchen sink. Likewise, don’t worry if you feel better bringing your own highchair into restaurants. Do what makes you comfortable. It’s your kid, after all.
What should you pack in your diaper bag? Here’s a few suggestions: Pacifiers, pacifier wipes, diapers, wipes, travel first aid kit, full change of clothes for the baby, toys, and bottle/food. I never used a changing pad, they always got dirty and I didn’t want that back in my clean bag, plus it was easier to wipe down the surface before and after.
Bibs and burp cloths
It doesn’t matter what brand really, but the more cotton, the better the absorbency. And you will need a lot of bibs and burp cloths, unless you like doing laundry every day. Why? Babies spit up a ton...My kids almost perpetually lived in bibs for the first six months. After all, who wants to ruin those super cute outfits?
Boppie
I can’t live without one...I even have two. I had three for awhile and almost one for each room. If you don't know the term Boppie, it simply a brand name to a type of pillow. The pillow is made into a curve that fits snuggly against your waist as you sit. The baby lays on top to breastfeed or sleep in your supported arms. Regardless of my conviction, this is a luxury item. It is not necessary, really; and as a budget saver, you can use a regular pillow for support.
Small Kitchen Timer
If you are breast-feeding, this is really useful because, unlike bottle-feeding, you can’t count the ounces given. So, the time spent feeding is important. When the babies are new born, the doctors want a goal of 10 minutes, each side. I never made this goal. I usually did 5-7 and my babies did fine. Regardless, it is all about how much weight they gain back in the first few days. The hospital will keep a close watch before they release you and then make you return within the next few days if concerned.
Breast Pump
Great article for choosing a breast pump suited to your needs is found below. I even learned something. Maybe I would have had better luck had I known what to look for before:
FOR DADDY
To be completely honest, dads, there's not much that you will actually "need" prior to delivery per say, but your love and support are very much needed. So with that in mind, in the mean time, pay close attention to the Need to Learn section. If you've got all that information down, then you'll be awesome!
My humble advice to a new dad...
Okay, dad, I know that you can feel at a loss during this whole process and that's okay. You'll find your way; just, keep positive and go with the flow. I wanted to take a moment to let you know a few important thoughts.
Simply put, you are an incredibly important part of this whole process, and not just the beginning part. I know it may not seem like it at times, but you are our rock of support. You are the shoulder to cry on when we have no idea why we are crying. You are the scratching post when we have no idea why we are so mad. You are the love that we need when we think we won't make it. It is your love for us and the family that we are making together that makes everything worth it in the end. So, if I haven't made this sappy enough for you or you are cringing hoping I'm done with my blubbering, then just remember this one thing: We love you very much, even if the hormones and the pain say we don't. So, bare with us, we'll get back to normal, I promise.
FOR BABY
Receiving Blankets
Receiving blankets work better for swaddling than the purposely-made swaddling blankets because you can adjust the tightness. The pre-made ones are so loose that the kiddos get out of them with little effort, which defeats the purpose of swaddling. Note: We always swaddled our kids in only a diaper. We used two blankets to keep the swaddle tight and the baby warm, but not too warm (see SIDs for overheating).
Pacifiers
Be careful of the type you pick because you’ll be buying thousands over the course. If you choose one that is hard to find, then good luck. Once your baby chooses one, no other one will do. Also, don’t be discouraged if your baby doesn’t take to it at first, just keep trying. The benefits of a pacifier outweigh the difficulty of quitting later: SIDS prevention, calming, etc.
Side note: Pacifiers will get dropped and thrown and dirty all the time. You can try the pacifier clips, perhaps they will work for you, but I found that my children just yanked them lose and then everything went on the floor. That just made more for me to clean in the end. Also, to clean a pacifier, you can use your mouth, if you want, but that can get pretty gross (trust me, a mouth full of hair and dirt isn't fun for you either). After the kiddos get teeth, it is best not to introduce your mouth germs into their sore little gums, especially if you are not confident of your own dental hygiene. However, as another option, there are pacifier wipes but those can be expensive and not always available; so, if you use a normal wipe to clean them, just make sure there is no alcohol in the product, at the very least.
Finally, never, never, never, use antibacterial gel to clean the pacifier. Regular old soap and water is better; although, some soaps may not be good as well. The main point is to be careful of what you put in your baby's mouth, even if it is meant to clean. Not all cleaning products are made equal.
As a final, final note on cleaning pacifiers, be sure not to wash pacifiers in the dishwasher as they are not all made dishwasher safe and the heated drying can cause mold to form in the interiors of the device. As a rule of thumb, I always just threw away pacifiers that got water on the inside. I didn't bother squeezing it out, because it would still not dry properly, which means you couldn't adequately prevent the possibility of mold forming.
LUVS Diapers
LUVS diapers are one of the cheapest and the best by far. I’ve used all other brands. With Luvs you change less often, have less diaper rash, and get fewer leaking accidents. So, you end up buying less diaper rash cream, have fewer ruined clothes, and spend less on buying diapers. As a second option, Pampers work okay, but Luvs will always rule my house.
Dove Bar Soap: White
Even though most baby soaps say hypoallergenic, not all baby soaps are good. My second baby broke out in a rash soon after she was born and I was using a hypoallergenic baby soap. My doctor suggested Dove Soap White. After two uses, the rash disappeared and has never returned. Interestingly, some doctors have also recommended this soap for acne sufferers.
Feeding Chair
If you don’t buy a rocker, find, buy, and/or pick a chair for feeding. It should be comfortable and easy to clean. Babies “vomit” all the time. Okay, my mother-in-law would correct my word usage to "spit-up," but trust me, just because spit-up sounds nicer, doesn't mean that the stuff smells nicer. Breast milk is much less smelly and stains less often than formula, but both can be pretty gross. See the advice on burping to help prevent after-feeding vomit. However, even with the techniques, you will not eradicate the entire problem; at least I didn't.
Bath Seat
Buy a bath seat for your bathtub or sink. Be careful with sink versions. Not all sink chairs fit all sinks and that can make things unsafe. If you have the room and the tub, go with a bathtub version for easiness and safety. Also, I know this seems obvious, but don't leave your child unattended for any amount of time. Get all your items (towel, soap, etc.) prior to starting the bath water.
Rectal Thermometer
Most store bought ones are fine, but be careful to clean them properly, store them properly, and replace them frequently. Read the instructions on the box to the letter. Plus, only the tip should be inserted. Some thermometers come with safe guards for this purpose. However, be aware that your home thermometer will always read differently than an ER-technical-one. Usually yours will be higher, sometimes by a whole point. Finally, you should never take a temperature orally until they are, at least, 4 years of age. Babies just cannot sit still long enough or hold the thermometer properly in their mouth to get an accurate temperature.
Note to dad: If you are anything like my husband, here is what I have to say to you about taking a rectal temperature, “Honey, get over it...yes, it’s in the butt. Just do it.”
FOR HOME
Rocking Chair
A rocking chair can be a real lifesaver when putting the kiddo to sleep. It saves your arms and fee. We haven’t found that the traditional rocker is any worse than the new “safe” ones (gliders); in fact the older ones seem to be better made. We had two gliders brake on us before our son was six months old. So, as long as you don’t forget that the little one is putting their hand under the rocker’s feet as you are rocking...oh, the things some people worry about...Then again, I'm not much better...this just wasn't one of my neurosis.
indoor-rocking-chairs/nursery/607+610+4294734883.cfm
(scroll down for a hint in buying)
Play Gym
Baby Einstein Around the World (link listed below) or something like this can be a very safe place to put your infant to play and learn. As well give mommy a break from holding. However, not every kiddo will like this, but it’s worth a try.
Pack-n-Play
This is wonderful for putting the baby down other places than the nursery. If you have a two-story home this works great for a changing station and nap area downstairs. Plus if you take trips, it’s great because the baby is already use to it. Other companies now make their version of a pack-n-play, but Graco is the oldest and best.
Bassinet
For the first month, at least, it is advised to keep the infant near you during sleep; therefore, this item works great for a place to sleep near your bed. Be aware of co-sleeping and SIDS—read all you can on the subject to protect your baby. But in a nutshell: keep them flat on their backs with their faces out for clean air. As a budget saving option, you can use a pack-in-play instead of buying an extra bassinet.
Swing
This is an item that some parents won’t live without. Neither of my kids liked it; so, it was a big waste of money, and they are expensive. This is your call, but don’t be fooled into thinking that it is a must have item.
Stroller/car seat combo
Do some research on this before you buy. There are some good ones and some unsafe ones. Graco is normally a good brand, but check things out. Also, to be especially safe, you can have “professionals” install your car seat. Check with your local fire departments or Babies R Us. Another good place to start for information about car seat safety is www.nhtsa.gov, be sure to type "car seat" into the search box.
White noise/Humidifier
White noise is supposed to help infants sleep as it simulates the sound in the womb. However, if you live in a dry place, a humidifier usually makes enough noise. As a free option, you can use an old radio and tune to an empty channel.
Side note: Keep your house air filters changed frequently (once a month). Moldy and dirty filters/ducks can cause chronic sinus infections or very similar symptoms. This I learned the hard way.
Diaper Trash Can
Unless you want your bathroom to remain smelly every time you walk into it, get a diaper can. A real diaper can, trust me, is necessary. A trash can with a lid will not always be enough. I tried a regular trash can with a lid and just about died of asphyxiation from the smell every time I opened it. Plus it isn't one of those smells that dissipates quickly. However, I would not recommend the Diaper Genie because it requires special bags that are hard to find and an added expense. I've used the same Diaper Champ for years and it does a good job, especially if you wash it every few months. For a budget saving option, if you have a garage, put your dirty diapers in a trash can out there. It is a little more effort to throw away, but you save the hassle of special trash cans or bags, etc.
Baby Bottles
Let the baby try out different nipples. The rule of thumb: pick ones that look similar to your own. Once the baby has accepted a nipple, you should replace them monthly (mark on a calendar to keep track). Like all things, with frequent use, the nipples could become cracked, damaged, moldy, weak, etc. Throw them away, if they do. Additionally, if you find anything untoward with the nipple, such as strange coloring or misshaping, ere on the side of safety and throw it away.
Additionally, I found that the bottles with disposable “sacks” work for air control/gas, but this is not the most economical way to go. The most economical way to go is breast-feeding. There is very little cost associated with this route, none if you work at it, but not many of us have such a luxury.
Side note: A bottle warmer is unnecessary. For frozen breast milk use warm tap water to thaw and warm (Be sure to test temperature before giving to your baby as tap water can become quite hot). For formula you can mix with room temperature water (leave your jug of water out, not in the refrigerator). Be sure to use the milk within an hour (trust me, this stuff curdles just like real milk if you leave it out and it smells really, really--again, I did the two "really"s on purpose--bad). As a final note, it is best to use water fortified with fluoride. Some tap water is okay, but it is probably safer (if you don't know the composition of your home tap water) to stick with the Nursery Baby water that is sold at most grocery stores.
Cleaning Supplies
When at all possible, use "green" products, as they are generally less harmful to both you and baby. I have also made a habit of not wearing shoes in the house in order to keep things cleaner. I also try to cleaning the house once each week (bathrooms and floors, if nothing else).
Long ago, I used regular cleaning products (the brands you can name by memory, but that will remain nameless here), and I always spent most of the cleaning day with a headache. However, since using green products, I have yet to have such a repeat experience. Here is a good article that address this issue:
Here is what the American Pregnancy Organization has to say on the matter:
As a budget saving method, try making some of your cleaning products at home:
Home Safety
This is a big important section, and it covers a broad range of information. From water, to lead paint, to child proofing, to poisons, there is a lot to consider.
The following website has done a wonderful job of addressing, I believe, everything: http://www.homesafetycouncil.org/
Although the website above contains more information, the following website has a convenient checklist for particular rooms in your house: http://kidshealth.org/parent/firstaid_safe/home/household_checklist.html
The only thing that I noticed is not specifically addressed on the two previous sites is the issue of lead poising. So, if you live in an older home that you suspect might have lead paint, please go to the following link for more information on what to do: http://www.epa.gov/lead/.
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